hannibal lecter

Fri, 07 Sep 2007 01:01:18 GMT

we're all doing fine. michelle is feeding the baby a steady diet of white russians and parliaments and we figure that's all it needs. adam isn't too upset because soon he will have kayla dupree and that is all that matters.

in case anyone still comes and checks this journal i still think pete wentz is a douche

i only post when funny shit happens no one else wants to play me

Tue, 03 Jul 2007 19:21:05 GMT

CONGRATS NICOLE AND MIKEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! what a skinny child you will have

harry twatter

Sun, 06 May 2007 19:34:56 GMT

WHEN THE SUN SHINES WE'LL SHINE TOGETHER SOMETHINGSOMETHING HERE FOREVER SAID I'LL ALWAYS BE YOUR FRIEND TALK IT OVER AND STICK IT OUT TIL THE END NOW THAT IT'S RAININ MORE THAN EVA KNOW THAT WE'LL STILL HAVE EACH OTHA YOU CAN STAND UNDER MY UMBRELLA YOU CAN STAND UNDER MY UMBRELLA...ELLA...ELLA..AY...AY...AY...UNDER MY UMBRELLA...ELLA..ELLA..AY..AY..AY..UNDER MY UMBRELLA

i feel like this song was written about jay-z. i really honestly do. i have no fucking idea what to update about i hate the music that my band makes and john isn't dead yet so it's not like we have anything to celebrate other than the fact that i'm constantly inebriated and we now document this with youtube tour updates. michelle still isn't pregnant with my kids, i think ryan passed out like 3 months ago and still hasn't woken up, and paris is going to jail. yeah that about covers it. COCKADOODLEDOO

thanks for the nudges, sexies ;)

Sun, 05 Nov 2006 01:16:25 GMT

i don't know what the fuck i am supposed to update about. i don't even know what i do anymore. there are only so many fat lazy bald why did i quit taking back sunday updates that i can make. i could do those six facts if i was really in the mood to blow my brains out but i'm not. so how about you all tell me how you are doing instead. i presume michelle is still dating adam. i know that ryan has a steady lay and so does mikey and consequently so does nicole considering she is his steady lay. i guess that catches me up on my gossip, right? superb.

well since i haven't been up to much aside from nailing linda nolan and running over the elderly in the petco parking lot, i guess i will talk about totally awesome. it starts in like, an hour? i don't know. i saw a preview for it on vh1 a few days ago where tracy morgan asked if mikey day had ever broken someone's arm for sweatpants money and i was sucked in and put a reminder on my phone so i don't miss it. i guess even if i do by some miracle of hell then i can waste 20 bucks on the dvd on tuesday. i am in the habit of wasting a shitload of money lately even if i don't have a really steady income and daddy-o is still writing my rent checks. i mean i get the necessities here and there; taco bell, vitamin water, granola bars but then i buy absolutely ridiculous things like entire seasons of cartoon shows on dvd and not even the good cartoon shows like family guy. it isn't anime either. i hate anime. does anyone else hate anime?

oh i have something good to update about. the pussycat dolls. why do people like the pussycat dolls? is it because they're half naked? i can point you in the direction of more attractive half naked girls. go to a strip club. in jersey. yeah, i think jersey girls are more attractive than the girls in the pussycat dolls. can anyone tell me why people find this attractive? i mean aside from the nipple. and it's not like they have talent keeping them afloat or anything. i'm pretty sure our album is going to be better than theirs but we don't have the tits to bet on that although i bet will's "growth" will bring in some cash if we use that for promotion. if that falls through, there is always nine toes nolan.

this is why i hit six weeks guys, sorry

Fri, 25 Aug 2006 19:53:16 GMT

you're kinda cute baby are you new in town. my name is timb, aka shaunus crown.

four weeks? really how did i go that long without updating. i'm sure there's a lot of pop culture i haven't commented on, i haven't threatened to kill myself in quite awhile. oh but i did see one of those gap ads this week. ouch. thank nicole for this piece of work because i really don't have anything productive to say since ryan stopped drinking so it's become increasingly hard to hold him down and rape him when he isn't impaired by alcohol. joe and i closed every window in the apartment the other day and tried to see if we could actually attempt fishbowling the living room but it didn't work out. i started tickling his feet and he kicked me in the face and i was knocked unconscious. mission: failed.

the other day i almost ran over a rooster when i was coming home from the studio (the nolans' basement). a fucking turkey, nucz. seriously!!!!!!11111 i don't know what else to say i love you all and i miss you all bai

p.s. fall out boy fans are still commenting to me this is amazing

Sun, 23 Jul 2006 00:09:06 GMT

FANTASY ISLAND HERE I COME

Fri, 21 Jul 2006 04:07:45 GMT

now that the inevitable is out of the way, let's get down and dirty. and i don't mean the kind of dirty where you are screaming "no shaun, not there i'm still sore" i just mean..well i mean it is time to embarass you because that is how we celebrate in long island.

first of all i want to point out that your repressed homosexuality is killing everyone you know, especially me. i know you enjoy our late nights when you're home, painting my toenails and helping me wax my legs before we do leave-in treatment with your hair but every night is forgotten in the morning when you wake up and decide you need to bag four vaginas today to prove that you're straight. i play along with the charade because ryan, there doesn't seem to be a reason to change. i feel so dirty when you start talking cute, i want to tell you that i love you but the point is probably moot. because you're watching them with those eyes and you're loving them with that body, i just know it. and you're holding them in your arms late late at night....

actually ryan you can stay "straight" as long as you want as long as u do not forget about me....because i do love you, you beautiful creature. happy birthday. you're still younger than me so you know that means you can't tell your mommy and daddy (or the church) that you said no. it's just a rule.

Sun, 09 Jul 2006 05:20:12 GMT

dear nicky hilton

since in the past few years i have not only nailed your sister but your childhood friend, nicole richie i think it is only appropriate that i nail you next (especially considering a bird told me you were now on the market). i do not have much to offer other than my mr clean looks, unemployment checks, and really crappy music but i know that you know that i write the good songs. mcdonald's is pretty romantic if you ignore all the immigrants working behind the counter and who doesn't like free toys in their meal? circle yes or punch me in the face xoxoxoxoxo

shaun cooper

praise lord saget

Tue, 27 Jun 2006 20:09:57 GMT

continuing on with the theme of what you missed if you did not grow up properly during the 1990s, let's get talking about bob saget. if you're old enough, you know him..you love him..he's the sag. he's the fucking man. danny tanner, best ambiguously gay dad ever. neat freak, honky, whitey suburban mcwhiterson. he was the end all be all tv dad in the 1990s but more importantly he was BEAUTIFUL. i guess along with having poor musical taste after 1988, you also lack appreciation for the saget. i can't be angry about that. i can only pity you.

oh let's not forget america's funniest home videos. bob had the ability of making every nutshot into the funniest fucking thing you have ever seen with his amazing work in voiceovers. oh, bob baby. i watched that shit every week. never missed an episode.

how long was full house on the air? really? i mean how long did bob saget put up with kimmy gibbler without killing or sexually molesting her? my hat is off to you, danny tanner. i would have stuck and slapped my penis around every crevice in that devilish creature's body. go saget, go saget go.

did anyone see his appearance on entourage where he spent every day at a whorehouse and threatened to cut off turtle's penis if he tried to fuck his daughter? let's hope you saw that. let's just hope.

Sun, 11 Jun 2006 04:02:03 GMT

i'm so sick of the cheating. from you and you and you and most especially you, you disease infested whore. we're all over, i'm moving to flushing and keeping asian women in bathtubs of acid.

Fri, 09 Jun 2006 10:49:39 GMT

so i'm not allowed to move out but adam is? i'm not leaving ryan and joe to their own devices with a bunch of chicks and beer, it's just not happening. sometimes i feel like i do not really fit in between michelle and adam, ryan and his beer, joe and his bong but then i realize that i'm the balancing factor and it all works out. i don't think michelle is allowing me to be in the same room as adam and ryan because i just make everyone a little more retarded so i've decided that i am not signing on aim for awhile as much as i enjoy staring at my screen name and thinking about how great the new young hannibal movie is going to be, even without anthony. really, that's all i have to look forward to in my life - movies and food and music as lame and boring as that is because i choose to not acknowledge the fact that i have a career based on the fact that my career sucks and i'd rather talk about being wasted in long island constantly and waking up in long beach surrounded by hacidic jews and puerto ricans and whatever the hell vinnie accardi is.

every time i have something to look forward to, it seems that fall out boy has to go and ruin it and such is the case with snakes on a plane. i don't know if i can go see anything that pete wentz is profiting from. actually, i'm going to update about why i hate fall out boy again. once again, this is not anything personal this is about their lame ass music and i realize i have no place to talk about lame music but i don't have fat 12 year olds with shaun cooper myspace layouts following me around. no offense to joe, but fall out boy is not anything special. they've got one good member, one that some girls think is good looking, and a fat lead singer and a guy that reminds me of john with longer hair on drums. i haven't ever thought of their lyrics as anything more than mediocre but everyone around mtv and the fat asshole scene is bowing to them like they're the next nirvana. they're not. god they are so fucking shitty and no one even understands. the music is boring, the lyrics are something that look like they're written by angsty junior high school students who were jilted by their winter formal date. their fanbase doesn't even know what good music is. these kids have never listened to pink floyd or the smiths or sunny day real estate or the kinks or the sex pistols or the clash. they wear the t-shirts though, because that's what's cool. i'm not even sure that these kids know what those bands did for music or if they realize that the 80s were about more than pink hair and debbie gibson and bon jovi. these kids weren't even alive in the 80s which is a pity for them and it's a pity for us because now we're all being punished for their shitty music taste because they grew up on whitney houston and o-town and good charlotte and all this lame ass shit that's not even worth remembering. in fact, new rule: if you were born after 1988 you don't know what real music is unless you have an older brother or sister or a good parent that exposes you and teaches you about it. i know that i'm going to. my kids are going to be raised on a steady diet of guns n roses and nirvana and independent music that's actually good and never makes it to radio because clearchannel doesn't understand that although music can be a business, it's an art first and foremost. at least i know my band has good ideas and just a poor execution of those ideas. we don't claim to be a new anything, we don't claim to do anything other than suck balls but at least we know where we stand. if you want to know who is going to be the saving grace of music, stop looking at fall out boy and most of the long island scene (i don't include noy in this statement, i think they're one of the more amazing bands to emerge from LI) and start looking at the shit that they AREN'T playing on the radio or isn't on the myspace mainpage.

this is a few days late but happy birthday annie hardy, have a burger.

Thu, 18 May 2006 12:24:03 GMT

dear brandon reilly, i almost photoshopped your head on a picture of a starving ethopian child but i figured that was too politically incorrect even for me. since i currently do not acknowledge my career because it sucks, i'm offering my services to beat off afi fans during a week of your tour this summer as a bday present. have a good one and welcome to being old, i am sure you will enjoy it more than i do.

p.s. who was i kidding

FORNICATING IS DIRTY

Wed, 17 May 2006 04:23:52 GMT

lmao what the fuck? this is why i sleep with one person every six months!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this is better than icons of me

Sat, 06 May 2006 02:33:05 GMT

hey ladies, hey fellas, hey ryan and mikey. so what's been going on in your world? BECAUSE MINE IS CRUMBLING ALL AROUND ME. i was reading through blender and hawthorne heights got to meet the edge. of course, this is depressing to me because i know i'll never be as fat as anyone in hawthorne heights so the edge will never want to be my friend. do the hardy boys still wrestle? they had a hot chick following them around all the time and they weren't fat, maybe they'll teach me a few moves. i remember when pete rose (i almost wrote pete wentz??) was in the wwe and he would come out in a chicken suit and put people in a sleeper hold and call it the CHICKEN WING. i do it to john sometimes. chicken suit and all because i know how much johnny loves chicken fingers. that reminds me while i'm at it if i have you added and you don't have jnolan added go do it now. he's still ugly but he's reasonably sane if you choose to ignore the fact that he wrote sunrise highway.

back to wrestling, the only thing that has ever brought me close to the wrestling world is michelle's dad who bears an uncanny resemblence to hulk hogan. sometimes after church i would go over to the nolan house for brunch and when pastor hoglan wanted to get out of his preacha clothes, he just stood up from the dinner table and RIPPED THEM OFF. poor linda could not handle herself and she would press her boobs all together and take pastor nolan right on top of the eggs and we would have to excuse ourselves from the table and go from bottle of corn pops in the middle of associated. sometimes when i'm watching hogan knows best it reminds me of being at john and michelle's house in high school. i didn't go to south shore christian academy because like ryan heil/south park's the mole would say god is a fucking gutless faggot. i bet the undertaker could pin god in forty seconds!! i bet jerry the king lawler could even pin god in forty seconds.

we went to the noy show at the annex last night. ashley hartman flew out on the LJ plane for the occasion. she drank a lot and started rubbing on everyone with tattoos because when she has that much beer she thinks that everyone with tattoos looks like ryan! i hope that didn't hurt her chances. when their set was over joe and i drank appletinis and spooned under the bar while brandon was flipping off everyone's mothers and sammy was trying to figure out when he turned 33.

matt rubano you got hit in the face with a mic because the good lord wanted it to be and that's the first smart thing he's done since sending crazy christian mothers against FOB

i won't update for awhile after this i swear

Wed, 26 Apr 2006 04:06:47 GMT

i got two sexual offers upon completion of this post and if that's not incentive enough to do it then i don't know what is. the task in itself should be a fun one so here goes nothing!

dear pete wentz - maybe people find it so hard to be friends and take you seriously because you're a dillweed. i'm going to touch upon how much you suck little by little, i have a list of bulletpoints and everything. now, i realize that i'm not even in a legitimate band anymore but to be honest i have never really had an ego about my musical career or being taken seriously or even being well liked. if i did, the last thing i would do to stake my claim as a "legit musician" would be taking a guest role on one tree hill. by the way you can't really act but i guess that's not really a requirement to be on that show. i have to give you credit though, it's probably the least annoying thing you have done in your career so big ups for that one.

your videos are not groundbreaking. i don't know what makes you think that they are. they are certainly pretty fucking laughable. lighting a girl's lawn on fire is probably considered stalking in at least 48 states and trying to be spike from buffy while forcing the rest of your band to be sarah michelle gellar without hot tits and nice hair isn't that smart either. i don't know who told you that these were enjoyable or even well thought out and original, but they were lying to you. you probably thought it was original all on your own but your concept of originality and what's smart isn't really that close to the rest of society's ideas. i think you're pretty much on your own plane of "originality" which includes ripping off really bad bands and really bad television shows and creating them into music and video concepts that don't really work all too well.

then you've got your whole idea that you're wholesome and 'straight-edge' but i've never seen any other straight edge band member's penis plastered all over the internet. the funny part was that you claimed that it was a joke or some shit like that but you were really sending it to your bffl's girlfriend when you were having sidekick sex with her. what? don't you have enough groupies to go out and fuck around with them? oh yeah, they're all fat and twelve and i don't that'd go over too well with your public relations team. have they ever tried to explain you downing a bottle of atavan in a best buy parking lot? what's the matter they weren't selling your cd? geez pete, your life is so rough.

the reason that people don't like you is because you constantly complain and your boyfriend is a fucking nutjob. you sit there and nitpick at people for not paying enough attention to you and then make assumptions about people that you've never spoken to based on the people that they are friends with. its not a matter of people changing or people ganging up on you, its just flat out the fact that you suck and you're the most annoying person in the world and nothing you do or say in your journal could ever change anyone's opinion. i also have to give you mad karma for holding the special olympics of mbp in your comments every time you update. where do i send my donations?

in short, its personal but not on the level that you think. just thought i'd clear that up for you.

xoxoxo shaun cooper

happy birthday tyson this is from me to you pal

Tue, 25 Apr 2006 03:01:16 GMT

today, i was surfing through youtube as i usually do in my manties while drinking some sunkist and enjoying the sounds of ryan masturbating to the string quartet tributes from the room next door. but today was not like any other day!!! oh no, no you see today was the day i found the most amazing trailer in the world and it inspired me in ways that some of you will never begin to understand. in fact i am even inspired to write a song about it later but right now its taking too much concentration to actually write something beautiful enough to compliment THIS AMAZING PIECE OF CINEMATOGRAPHY
ps this is the actual graphic for the real movie i want it tattooed on my back:

Tue, 18 Apr 2006 12:45:50 GMT

as tempting as living with two of my ex girlfriends at the same time sounded, i decided to move in with michelle and ryan and mandy, if she still lives there. that way i am only down to one ex-girlfriend and when adam comes over we can throw the girls out and have a sausage fest. i'm aware that i usually only update once every six weeks but i remembered how hilarious i am and i decided i'm staging a comeback. and i want to sexually harass john's boyfriend too but whatever. i deleted my entire friends list like 5 weeks ago and added people that i thought were important so if i don't have you added and you've added me then let me know because i'm a dickhead when it comes to sorting through the 200 journals in my friend of list. why did 200 people ever want me on their friends page in the first place?

ps leave aim names here

my new aim is SHAUNIBAL LECTER and this is not a drill

Wed, 12 Apr 2006 03:33:16 GMT

i don't appreciate being nudged, john. in case any of you haven't noticed i've been really making progress in my quest to become hannibal lecter. no bitch will sleep with me and i'm getting ready to saw someone's face off and wear it as a mask. after that, i'll be moving to italy where i'll empty out a commissioner's innards onto city streets and when that gets boring, i'm going back home to make johnny eat his own brain before inevitably feeding it to an asian child on a flight to europe. of course, the change in this course will be i'll feeding an asian girl and it will be romantic because she'll be my new mail order bride. china may be a communist nation but at least they fulfill the fantasies of bald unemployed men like myself. i say unemployed because i feel like we've got about another year left in straylight run and while john is convinced that elton is going to take pity on us and show up someday, i realize that elton's line of charity ends somewhere and he doesn't feel bad for pathetic self-loathing bands who realize that their fanbase is diminishing because THEY SUCK.

while you're all living in your fancy apartments with your pop star best friends (btw, ...???) my dad and i are doing just fine thank you. if i stay up too late he unhooks the cable in my bedroom and bolts my door from the outside like i'm harry potter and he's a dursley. its quite a nice little fantasy to live in. however, i do not have owls to communicate with my friends so i use the internet which is probably the most annoying way to stay in touch with people. there always comes a time when i start getting ims from someone i've never talked to before or flat out despise openly and they think that i'm bald so i need friends. i'm not bald and lonely, i am bald and disgruntled and its because i do not sign on to talk to anyone thats in fall out boy or other crappy scene bands. i exclude aar from this statement because i don't think that they are depressed or fat enough to be scene. and they're hicks. i don't think the scene lets in hick people because hicks don't have medical insurance and then they can't get prozac so they can't pretend they're depressed because we all know how cool depression is. i'm clinically depressed and it's not because i'm in a scene band. its because i have to spend so much time with positive people like will noon that i can't stand to be alive anymore.

i was going to end this update with a picture to express my all around disgust with the world but instead i decided to write a letter to alcohol...but that got tiresome after awhile so i just plagerized one

Dear Alcohol,

First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. My friend,
you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a
beer at the game, and you're even around in the holidays hidden inside
chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family
gatherings.

However, lately I've been wondering about your intentions. While I want to
believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel that your influence
has led to some unwise consequences:

1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I
question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity
takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those
ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear
from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?

2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I
eat a taco with chili sauce, along with a big Italian meatball and some
stale chips (washed down with WINE & topped off with a Kit Kat after a few
cheese curls & chili cheese fries)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you
went too far this time.

3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more
yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by
causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black & blue
marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me.
Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front
door key into the lock.

4. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous.
I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in
order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable. My entire
day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water, vitamin
B, bread products, aspirin), prior to going to sleep/passing out face down
on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be minimal &
in no way interfere with my daily activities.

Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to
ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great
stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when I
just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets.

In order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my
grievances above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no
later than Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions &
hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership.

Thank you, Your biggest fan

P.S. THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 1 Innovative 2.
Preliminary 3. Proliferation 4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 1. Specificity 2. British
Constitution 3. Passive-aggressive disorder

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Thanks, but I don't want to have sex.

2. Nope, no more beer for me.

3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.

4. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?

5. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing..

Tue, 28 Mar 2006 21:46:41 GMT

well wilmer when i slept with mandy it was like the best fresh mcdonalds apple pie i have ever had...

nicole richie is mine you midget

Thu, 23 Mar 2006 23:41:24 GMT

matt rubano i don't know what kind of hallucinogen you are taking but no one is better than me

adam nailed my ex? i guess we are even now kind of

Tue, 21 Mar 2006 05:30:25 GMT

sxsw was pretty sweet. austin is the city of sluts. its basically a bunch of drunk UT chicks being inticed into taking their shirts off. i was trying to convince will to keep his on but he's not easily persuaded. in fact, he's outright defiant. he takes his shirt off in spite of my request to let me keep my dinner in my stomach. its like when john doesn't wear a paper bag on his head. they believe in punishing me and michelle and society. as much as i complain about being in straylight, i know i probably shouldn't. it's the only time in the world i will ever be the second hottest person in the band. kind of like, i don't know, what jc was to nsync. yes, that's it. michelle is jiggalake and i am jc. that works.

this is the only time aside from the time that we toured with brand new in the uk that we have actually acknowledged that we are touring. i for one did not see this coming. basically, every tour between then and now has been me getting drunk and taking my pants off or getting drunk and sliding down giant slides or getting drunk and dancing to my michelle. wow, all of a sudden my life seems worth living.

nicole richie i miss you. i'm going to get drunk and watch harry potter, i think that will be a nice change of pace.

hehe hi johnny

Tue, 07 Mar 2006 09:09:44 GMT

i'm awake so i thought i'd give you an update on how things have been going.

the campus invasion tour is gay, garlic chicken is totally awesome, st patrick's day is next week, a guy wanted to make out with will at a show, and i nailed michelle. you would think that since i have been spying on her getting dressed since i was sixteen that i would write a little more than that but that is sufficient for now i think!

consider this an "ooc note"

Sat, 25 Feb 2006 05:28:13 GMT

since for the past two and a half to three years there have been numerous articles concerning shaun leaving taking back sunday in favor of joining a "band" called straylight run, i thought i should just make it clear that MBP shaun will not actually be acknowledging this change. sure, adam lazzara may be beautiful but shaun does not have a jealousy issue unless it interferes with his ability to score a mighty amount of poontang and with a face like his how could anything interfere? if you mention anything relating to straylight run aside from lusting after the sweet titties of michelle nolan please be informed that shaun will just laugh at you..and then delve into a state of confusion and depression that he will not be coaxed out of. without shaun, this band does not exist.

also, from this point forward on mondays, wednesdays, and sundays shaun will only answer to the name cocky balboa. the trauma caused by being associated with a band with such a horrific name and tendency to make shitty piano emo rock has given shaun the opportunity to develop a severe case of schizophrenia. on these days, shaun's penis swells to three times its normal size and it becomes difficult for women to resist his alterego cocky. these women were later rushed to the hospital after their vaginas were stretched in ways that top medical doctors all over the country had never seen before. they've probably seen it in amsterdam, but no one bothered to check amsterdam. one woman even went as far to say that having sex with cocky was like trying to squeeze their feet into a pair of jimmy choos. well, this story is going on for too long but it's just a warning for shaunny's ladyfriends and bum buddies.

peace love and myspace freaks xoxoxoxo

oh and ]HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOHN[

Wed, 01 Feb 2006 21:47:47 GMT

so a few months ago, someone sent me an arctic monkeys song and i thought it was alright but nothing super duper. two weeks ago i see them on mtv you hear it first and all of a sudden it's all over my friends page. is that what you people do? do you guys wait for a new artist to be put up on you hear it first and then put it as your music so you look cool and indie and like you have super taste in music because mtv told you that they were going to be big? are you the people that want to be like I LISTENED TO ____________ BEFORE THEY WERE FAMOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111 yeah for like two weeks before they were famous. shut up. do me a favor and go get your music off the myspace main page where you belong.

i don't have much to be grateful for but at least i'm not touring with fob. sorry brandon reilly, i know how much your life must suck right now. on top of that it has to be in the uk so you're stuck with people with bad teeth and poor showering habits. we opened for rooney and that's bad but it's not THAT bad. maybe if it was just fall out boy, or maybe if it was just aar, but not both at the same time. no offense i want to have sex with tyson and mike but its like expecting them to buy our album it's just not going to happen.

well that's basically all i had to say for right now. oh, wait. i heard michelle and adam reconciled? i'm so disappointed. here is what you are missing out on slut

dreamysigh

Fri, 13 Jan 2006 00:38:08 GMT

i am not andrew mcmahon. i am sure that i am the last person you want or need to hear this from but i am pretty sure that you know already anyway. everyone else does. i miss living in the same apartment as you. the only time we've ever been on what can actually can be considered a date was six years ago at our senior prom and even then i never got to kiss you. you didn't wear high heels because you didn't want me to feel short and you stayed with me the whole night regardless of the fact that there were a million other guys that would have killed to have spent that night with you and instead you hung out with me. i like that you're a raging lesbian and more than often the only thing you say to me is 'i hate you shaun'. i like that you read books like survivor and watch movies like kill bill, you are cooler than any other girl i know. you encourage my obsession with asians and twelve year olds but i'm sure that if you knew what i was really interested in you wouldn't really want to encourage it. i'm not saying this because i want to pursue anything, i'm saying this because i think that you deserve to know. wow this is creepy enough bye